The Big #1

When I found out I was pregnant with Beanie, I started writing letters to earmark tales of my pregnancy with her and for something for her to look back on and read. I’ve (been trying to) email them to her via her email address, kind of an electronic baby book.

This was written the day I found out we were expecting Beanie.


21 Jan 11

Dear Beanie:

Today is a huge day. Today, we found out that we are expecting you!

When Daddy and I moved in together, we decided we would eventually get married and start a family. We both agreed that we wanted kids. Being in the Coast Guard, I wanted to wait to start a family because I didn’t want to move you over and over again. After a few months ago, we decided we didn’t want to wait so we tried and tried. I was told that the likelihood of me getting pregnant was slim, due to a bout of cervical cancer.

Finally today, we learned we are pregnant with you and we couldn’t be more blessed. We definitely have an angel looking down on us. The look on your Daddy’s face, when I told him we were expecting a baby, it’s a look I’ll never forget. He is so overjoyed and full of emotion. He actually thought I was joking at first but then he saw the pregnancy test and we both knew, we were having a baby and we were so excited.

We told Mommom, Gammy, and Poppop about you. They couldn’t be more excited! We also told Aunt M, Uncle B and they can’t wait to have you play with Cousin T. Aunt T and Uncle S are also having a baby! They are due with a baby boy and he’ll share your birth year! We’re going to find out if you are a boy or a girl but that will have to wait until May. For the time being, I’m hoping and praying for stickiness and that you stay put. I want to meet you more than words can say. I already know you’re a fighter and you want to be here with us. I’m so excited 🙂

Love, Mama

PS. Always Remember, Mama Loves You


One year ago yesterday, I remember being 4 days overdue and quite ready. I laying in bed and around 0715, the contractions started. They were manageable so I didn’t wake E up. He stayed home that day and we walked around everywhere we could think of. Imagine walking through the Disney Store at the mall while in labor. That was super fun 😉

I didn’t want to go to the hospital because I wanted to be med-free and I didn’t want to be chained to a bed so we walked and I stayed home until we hit the 17 hr mark. After that, I realized I needed a break. It was mostly back labor and that was what hurt the most.

17 hours after the first contraction, we were on our way to the hospital. We got there around 0030 (through the detours and the bumpiest road known to man) and I got to sit in Triage for another 9 hours. Around 0900, the midwife says “lets get you set up”. By this point I had been in labor for over 24 hrs (my water hadn’t broken but they considered me in “active labor”) and I broke down and asked for some medication. I had gotten a dose of Stadol while in Triage and dear barbara, that was funny enough that E still talks about it.

With the epidural started, I started to feel better. Enter the Pitocin.

I’ll save the boring details of the next 12 hours but suffice to say, there were emergencies and one big argument with the midwife and OB but finally I had a c-section.


27 Sept 11

Dear Beanie:

Well, you are finally here and Daddy and I couldn’t be more excited. We never thought this day would come, that we would get to hold you and tell you how much we love you and how long we waited to meet you. You are definitely our miracle baby.

We went through the doctor appointments to make sure you were healthy and growing and thank Heanves, you were perfect looking. There were times you scared us but thanks to the modern day medical marvels, everything came back normal.

I labored through today and finally, at 9:55p, you were here, yelling and kicking and carrying on as though any pissed off woman would do. You are in the NICU and will be for a little while due to some complications (all from me, nothing to do with you) so itll be some time before I get to hold you and snuggle you and tell you how much I love you.

I can’t believe you are finally here, Beanie. I love you more than words can ever express and I can’t wait to hold you.

Love, Mama

PS. Always remember, Mama Loves You.


Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, it’s what you are expected to give, which is everything.
– Katharine Hepburn

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