Happy 2012!

I seriously meant to post something like, last week sometime, as a “oh hey, Happy New Year” and all that blah blah blah excitement but in my working frenzy, I didn’t. I wish I had a good excuse but I don’t. And I’m too damn tired to make one up.

I’m not positive why her pants are pulled up to her nipples. I’m inclinded to blame my nephew, who is holding her, but it’s probably just that they were wicked big and instead of dressing her in clothes that fit, I choose to dress her stylishly and in skinny jeans.

I told her we had to go to the doctors — I got this face. Almost as if to say “Are you f**king kidding me, Ma?”

She had to get some shots.



Bath Time is always a treat. However, I’m beginning to realize that she thinks being awake is an issue, as evident by her expression

So Christmas — yea. That was fun. Beanie wasn’t down with the photo shoot. All we wanted was one lousy picture of her and C to document their first christmas. Just one. We got him poking her in the eye, her falling over on him, him looking at her like she was friggin crazy, and then we got this beauty.

“Fuck It. We’re over it.”

 She got over it quite nicely, obviously.

and yes, for the record, E and I pierced her ears before Christmas. I don’t care what you say, lecture me all you want but I did it for safety reason. The Safety Reason being that if one more innocent bystander random person tells me “Oh, what a precious little man”, I will cut a bitch.
Have you ever encountered those people that think their child is awesome and gorgeous and is the next supermodel of the world? Yet when you see the pictures (which they happen to bust out long before the morning coffee), you are left thinking “now why, on Gods Green Earth would she hate me THAT much and show me that picture as a result of said hatred?” You are at a loss for words and you are scrambling to say anything but the first thing that comes to mind?

Parents: It’s ok to admit your child isn’t the prettiest.

 Mine happens to look like an Angry Sumo Wrestler, from time to time.

But fortunately that look went away quickly and for New Years, she spent some time with her personal body guard. 

And now that we’ve ushered in the New Year, we’re set for some serious football. This is her Lucky Dress 🙂 (no seriously, every time she wears it, the Ravens win.)

Now Chunk is weighing in at a whopping 13 lbs 12 oz and is 24 1/4″ long.

And she snarls if you call her “Chunk”. A fun fact I learned the hard way.

Happy Merry Everything!

2011 has been quite a year!

We went to the church with our closest family and friends
We had a Baby…


…and I fell even deeper in love
So from our family to yours out there — Happy Merry Everything!

(Pardon Beanie’s blank stare. She wasn’t so much enjoying the flash photography)

**The photos printed on the Birth Announcement are courtesy of Laura Ruane at La Rue Photography, located in Dallastown, PA. She is a freelance photographer that I went to high school with. Those 5 shots are just a few of the MANY fantastic shots she captured (for what Beanie was allowing her to do) and her patience are that of a Saint! If you are in the area and looking for a photographer, I’d definitely look her up!**

Thanksgiving 2011

Ok so now that we all know I’m the world’s worst blogger (hello — you try blogging with a newborn!) but I figured let’s start it back up and let you know what’s up.

FB has been doing this whole “What I’m Thankful For”. I didn’t jump on that train this year but I have PLENTY to be thankful for so here goes (in NO particular order):
1) My Husband — The man makes me want to drink, plain and simple. But I love him dearly. I love not only how he makes me feel when he’s around but I love he makes me love me, which has been hard for me to do.


2) Beanie — My Miracle Baby — she is the light of my life. I want to hug her and love her and name her George. She screams at me and hates to let me sleep and will probably be found, staring at me while I sleep, plotting my doom, but I love her.

3) Doctor’s Being Wrong — I know this sounds absolutely ridiculous but because many doctor’s were wrong, I was able to get pregnant. Well that and my husband’s sperm but I’m not exactly listing that as a thing to be thankful for. That’s just gross.

4) Divorce — even more ridiculous, right? But because my divorce was FINALLY finalized, I was able to marry E and get on with my life.

5) Gibbs — He’s my silver-haired fox. I would have said Randy Orton but I once said “I’d let him throw me around the bedroom” but that was not very well received so we don’t joke about that anymore. We know Gibbs ain’t picking my fat ass up so it’s ok to list him.

6) The Posse of Ninja Moms — seriously, without these ladies, I’d be curled up in the corner of a room, swaying back and forth, wearing a straight jacket. Well, I still do that some days but it’s not nearly as often. Seriously, no words had ever been truer then being told “Right now you’re probably getting your ass kicked by this tiny human that doesn’t yet know how to be a human but it’s ok…” These words probably saved my life. That’s all I can say on this matter because, like Fight Club, what’s the #1 rule? Right. You get it.

7) The Sibling — she’s totally my best friend. She talks me down from the ledge. She just gets me.

8) My Sister In Law — we weren’t BFF when we first met and I totally get it. Here I come, the new chick, busting onto the scene and clearly Ethan didn’t have the best taste in women (I’ve seen pictures) so she’s all “who the hell is this new chick?” but I made her like me. That’s right, I MADE her. I’m all “we WILL be friends” and finally, she relented and humored me. Totally kidding. But we are friends now and defintitely embracing the sister role.

9) My Family — they are absolutely bat shit crazy but I love them and they are best family I could ask for. I don’t tell them nearly enough and that makes me suck but they know. I know they know. They know I know they know.

10) Friends That I’ve had for Upward of 26 Years — Friends come and go but I have a friend that I’ve had since we were 4. It’s so serious that even our dads were friends! I was recently in her wedding (the pic you see below) and she has been there for me through leaving for the CG, my divorce, my meeting and marrying E, having a baby, and I have no doubt in my mind that she will be there for me for years to come.

11) My Interwebs Friends — Don’t ask. It’s a secret.

12) Marney — if you don’t know about her, you betta axe somebody.

13)  Reality TV — reminding me that someone, somewhere has more drama in their lives then I do.

14) My Job — I hate it. I hate the people I work with. But I can’t complain because it pays the bills and after being home for so long, I’m looking forward to getting back into the rat race.

I’m positive I’m forgetting things but these are the first things I could think of and Beanie is starting to scream.

But at the end of the day, these two are my world and I never fail to remember or recognize that, despite all of my bad luck, I’m right where I should be

Welcome To The World

Contractions started at 0715 on Monday, 9.26.11. After 17 hours of unmedicated, trying to stick it out at home laborous contractions, I finally told E “Honey, it’s time”, although it went a little more like “get your shit, I’m in pain”. Poor boy only had 2 hours of sleep before I woke him up.

We got to the hospital at 1230 on 9.27.11 and we got to spend 7 hours in the triage area. For some reason, the midwife on call refused to check me. She did, however, offer me some Stadol for the contractions. Let me tell you, this stuff — it’s interesting. Trying to itch my nose, I smacked myself in the face quite a few times. That was the extent of her bedside manner.

Thankfully, once the shift changed, there was a host of new staff and they were fantastic. Around 0730, the midwife checked me and I was 2.5cm dilated so they said “mmkay, you can stay” and we got to walk to our room. We weren’t leaving without our baby girl!

Once we got to our room, I was lucky enough to get an epidural. That wasn’t in my original plan but after having contractions for 24 hours, I needed something. Problem is, they had trouble with it. They finally got it, or so they thought.

I labored through the day and around 2:30p, they broke my water. Let me tell you, there is nothing ok about having them break your water. Not because it’s gross but because it’s like you pee yourself and you can’t control it.

Labor continued and they told me I was 8cm and I was going to get pitocin to help me progress.

It was all downhill from there.

The pitocin and the epidural didn’t mix well and I couldn’t breathe. They turned back one of the two and I was ok so I slept for a bit. Until all of a sudden, I’m awoken by the nurse, telling me that I needed to roll over. Problem was, because I had the epidural (and whatever they did to it), I had zero control over my legs/lower half. It took 3 people to roll me over. Turns out, because of the mixture of the epidural and the pitocin, my heart rate plummeted and the baby’s stopped registering completely.

They turned down the epidural and I felt everything. I was so out of it though, I couldn’t communicate, other then to cry. They got everything under control and I slept some more.

Until it happened again.

This time, my brother-in-law had come to visit and he was put to work. They had him help roll me over (Sorry B-I-L, if you saw anything that will cause you to never make eye contact with me again). After they got my heart rate back up and the baby’s heart rate was back on the monitor, they said “time to push”.

Yea, that didn’t work.

After 3 hours of pushing on and off, I finally said “I’m done”. 24 hours+ without food (sorry but ice chips don’t do shit for hunger), and 39 hours in labor, I was calling it a day. The midwife on call wanted to argue but I ended up with a c-section. I started feeling ill and sure enough, I had a temperature of 100.4*.

I had a c-section but again, the meds didn’t work so I felt everything. After they got her out (unbeknowst to me because no one told me what was going on), I finally asked for something strong so they gave me something that knocked me out and by “knocked me out”, I mean, I don’t remember anything from 10p Tuesday night to 2:30am Wednesday morning.

It wasn’t until 3am that I was coherent enough to be told that our baby girl was in the NICU. With my fever, it turns out I had something called Chorioamnionitis. No one told me this until Wednesday afternoon. I was hooked up to IVs and after I finished the bag, they allowed me to go to the NICU to see my baby girl for the first time ever. E had already seen her and met her so he was getting the info on her.

Regardless of the shitty experience of labor and delivery, the unprofessionalism of the NICU staff upon initial interaction, and the arguing with the midwife and Attending OB surgeon, I finally got my baby.

Welcome To The World
Born: 9.27.11
Time: 2155 (9:55p)
Weight: 8lbs, 4.46oz
Length: 20″
Proud Daddy, visiting his baby girl
Happy Mama, finally getting to hold Beanie
We are completely in love and while she’s giving us a run for our money, we couldn’t be happier

Baby Showers and lots of Pics

I didn’t go into detail with my first baby shower b/c I didn’t have a ton of pictures but I finally got some of them, along with pictures from my second shower!

I don’t have much to report until tomorrow so for now, I’ll leave you with pictures (and lots of them) 🙂

28 Weeks

29 Weeks
(and yes, I do feel like I’ve dropped and popped LOL)

(I thought it was a party for Mommom so I bought her a balloon. She was angry I took over her party LOL)

T, greeting me

This kid truly is my nephew. If there is a body of water, this kid will find it!

Great action shot of how the boys spent their time at the party. The Sibling managed to catch C1, mid-flip

“I match Uncle E!”

Handmade Blanket from Mommom B, in her colors of pink and brown

A handmade blanket from Mom C

The Sibling managed to get a handful of belly without me smacking her. She got lucky

Pin made by Mom C

S-I-L and I.
(Can you believe this skinny chick had a baby just 3 months ago?! Here’s hoping I get half as lucky!)

My gorgeous sisters and I

The Moms

Clay Baby on the cake

Cupcake Cake from Mom C and S-I-L’s shower

T and I

The Sibling and I

Getting ready to open gifts

Inevitably asking someone what the heck that was.
(I’m quite baffled by many baby things. This could be trouble)

The Theme of this little Girl

Someone got creative with the bows and string

Ahh, Aunt M and her Big Peckers obession

Sign for Daddy

Handmade Blanket from Aunt W
(All of us nieces and nephews are so incredibly lucky to get a hand-stitched quilt, made with love)

Cake from Mom S and The Sibling’s shower

This smug b*tch. She gets her drink and says “Lara, I miss you!”

Our Ocean City Trip

This past weekend, E and I met up with the Sibling, B-I-L, T, and some good friends for a camping trip down the ocean.

It was totally worth all the swelling and big hair.

Sitting on the Dock of the Bay
the Sibling and little H.
She is seriously our future in human form. Blonde ringlets, blue eyes, and full of sass. By the end of the weekend, E and I wanted to steal her and bring her home!
The boys figured this was just their speed
This picture is why I say our daughter will totally be like her. Literally 2 mins before we took this pic, she fought her mama tooth and nail, screaming “I NO TIRED! SWIM!” We see how that turned out
E and I on the boardwalk. Baby’s first trip to the Ocean was a hit
Who says Virginia is for lovers? True love starts on the Boardwalk in Ocean City, MD
(E and Timmy in the wagon — E is H’s older sister. They have another little girl, M, is 11 weeks old.
3 girls, all are so incredibly beautiful!)

25 Weeks

24 Weeks and I look like I swallowed a basketball. Orange isn’t my best color, huh? LOL

In between Weeks 24 and 25, we joined S-I-L, E’s sibling and the fam for a cook out at their casa and let me tell you, this Prego-Chick was in FatGirlHEAVEN! E’s sibling is not only a hell of a cook but Mom C made cookies and we all got a chance to snuggle with this little cutie:

Our nephew, C, being all cuddly and snuggly. Even Uncle E held him!!
 June 4th, we had our wedding reception party which was an absolute blast. We have been blessed with some fantastic family and friends and we were reminded of these friends after we were visited by some gorgeous ladies that traveled from a great distance to see us!
(from L to R: Me, Nancy with Baby Jane, Lyds, Erin, Erika with Baby Zane, Kristan, and Baby Teague. Teague is also my future son-in-law so E made sure to spend time with him)
Our Hometown Girls: Jenn, Me, Trish, and my Sibling (with T)
 25 Weeks and the belly continues to grow. This week we have actually seen the belly moving, which is a little creepy, I’m not going to lie. She’s a fiesty, little broad too. Whenever E is talking to me, she started kicking me like crazy. She’s a total Daddy’s girl already!! I’m just growing her, she’s waiting to bust out to go to Daddy, I’m telling you.
Mom C and S-I-L also threw us a surprise baby shower this past weekend! It was an absolute blast. We got a TON of clothes, a stroller, and some crib accessories. Most of all, it was nice to sit and talk with family and friends that came to celebrate with us.
Me and my Sister-In-Law
S-I-L and my Sibling


My (older) Sibling

(Note: you will notice there are no pictures of E and I. I promise you, he was there at both parties, we just weren’t in the same place at the same time, long enough to take a picture together LMAO)

Happy 24 Weeks

I don’t have a picture yet, that will come later today/tonight.

I’m not entirely positive what the hell that thing is in the Baby Cooper ticker. If it scares you almost as much as it scares me, I think I’ll change it.

From FertilityFriend.com:
Your baby now weighs around 1.5 lbs (700g), and measures about 8.8 inches (22cm) from crown to rump, but this varies from baby to baby.

Your doctor should be able to hear your baby’s heartbeat, using a stethoscope or Doppler ultrasound device. If your partner puts his ear right on your belly in the right position, he might even be able to hear it unaided if there is no background noise.

Your baby sleeps and wakes in a more regular pattern now. You may notice that your baby is particularly active when you are resting.

The center of your baby’s bones are beginning to harden.

If your baby is a boy, the peanuts will start to descend into the scrotum now. If your baby is a girl, the vajayjay will begin to hollow out and mature now.

Your baby can make a fist now and may already have a preference for the right or left hand.

With modern medical technology, your baby would have a chance to survive if it were born now.

(I realize some of this may not be politically (or anatomically correct), however, I simply can’t say vagina without giggling like a 12 yr old school boy. Go ahead and judge me. I’m ok with it)

I’m definitely beginning to feel the added weight that this little lady brings. Totally not a bad thing at all, but it’s getting harder to get more comfortable at night and stay that way. Poor E gets woken up at least twice a night (what am I saying, Poor E my behind! He steals my body pillow!)

We’re extremely relieved to see the last part of this paragraph about the baby having a chance to survive if born now. We aren’t anticipating an early delivery by any means, however, we do go for a Fetal Echo next monday. Due to some family history with heart issues, we want to make sure her ticker is working a-ok.

Saturday is the party and we’re SO super excited (ok, those are my words b/c those of you who know E, know he would NEVER, in a million years so he was so super excited about anything) to see everyone! Party starts at 1, along with food!

4 Day Weekend

On the eve of a 4 day weekend, we marked 23 weeks. The bebe has been poking me for quite some time now but just last night, I felt the first real kick! I started poking her back, seeing if she’d do it again. Apparently E thought that would piss her off and he kept telling me “leave her alone, would you?!” After three good kicks (and I was positive that was what they were), I relented and said fine.

Oh thankyoubabyjesus! It’s a 4 day weekend here for me and The Bean. Unfortunately, E has to work today but that leaves me time for this:

Yes. This is where the Doll is going to have to sleep. Eventually. But if you leave it to our planning skills, she’ll be nekkid, hungry, and sleeping on the floor.
Just kidding.
But not really. We seriously have to get cracking on this room. Since we weren’t aware that children would be in our future (we wanted them but we didn’t think they would make an appearance this soon!), this became our “put-everything-in-here-from-the-move-because-we-didn’t-realize-we-have-this-much-crap” room. Clearly we still have a bunch of crap to deal with (and what’s really sad is this is AFTER we took 3 FULL bins of “stuff” to Mom and Dad C’s!)
Last Sunday, we all got together for our nephew, T’s birthday. I can’t believe he’s 4 already!! And our other nephew, C, is already over 2 months old! Where is the time going?! The kids were extremely busy with the Mini-Cooper rides (Dad J got T a powerwheels Mini-Cooper) and a pinata (which was VERY brave of the Sibling and B-I-L, with the stick they gave to these kids!) and other pirate games. It was a blast, but this pregnant woman couldn’t keep up LOL
Last Sunday was also the Arts Festival. E, myself, Mom and Dad S, and Dad J went there before the party. It was nice to get out in the sun and walk around. We ran into some old friends and got to chat. It almost led to an encounter with a stalker of mine (which I didn’t know I had LOL) but fortunately there was no drama.
We did get to see some sights but this one has to be my favorite.
E said maybe I should call?


It’s Been A While

Sorry, it’s been a while, I suck at this “keeping up with things” bit. Thank god my sister-in-law told me they make timers for babies b/c otherwise, this here Baby in the Bellah would be absolutely screwed.
So I think the last time I actually posted on this thing, I was what? 13 weeks prego? Not much has been going on since then, with the exception of me getting bigger, E working more, and oh yea, we got hitched.
This is how we spent my 14-week pregnancy marker:
♥ Saying our vows ♥
(pls ignore the fact that I’m wearinga tent and focus on the fact that
you can give me a huge belly but you can’t take my heels away)


us w/ my parentals

us/ with E’s parentals

us w/ Mommom B
(she is really short and oh so full of sass!)

us w/ my paternal grandparents

(I had just said “We’re Married” in my best Phoebe voice a la Fri.ends)

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