40 Weeks

40 Weeks 4 Days

 

But nothing. Well, we did try something else but you all don’t need to know about that.

Needless to say, it was a “Hi Due Date. Bye Due Date” kind of time.

I’m officially no longer allowed to work. I made it 39w4d through the pregnancy before finally my doctors won and said “no mas!”

In hind sight, I should have stopped sooner. The commute was starting to get to me, the walking through the buildings was not fun, and the complications that were beginning to arise made me hate life. 

But I’m bored. 

I can only handle hearing “You ARE NOT the father” so many times before even Maury can’t help. 

Yesterday was a different story though. 

I woke up and I couldn’t stand up straight. The pressure I was feeling, I thought for sure something was going on. Of course I had no idea because this is my first baby and the midwife I had seen prior to refused to look to see what was going on “because I wasn’t having contractions”. 

After crawling through our apartment and sobbing, I made it to my doctor’s appt. Very little progress (read: NONE!) but one thing that was concerning to the midwife was the Little Lady’s heart rate kept dropping. So over the L&D we went. 

 All was well, she looks fantastic, heart rate is strong, and fluid levels look good.

But she’s not making it easy for us. She’s showing no signs of vacating. With a due date of 9.22, I’m thinking that date is going to come and go — with no debut…

E’s finding it harder and harder to argue with his wife who is 39 weeks pregnant (that would be me, in case you’re wondering… Yes, I’m still pregnant. Still.)

A conversation from last night:

Him: I may or may not have eaten one of your chocolate bunt cakes that you got from the Farmer’s Market.

Me: Are you f**king kidding me?

Him: umm….

Me: I will seriously kill you in your sleep.

Him: I’ll eat the other one, if that’s how this is going to go down.

Me: {{{staring daggers in his direction}}}

To my knowledge, my chocolate bunt cake is still there and E woke up, all parts in tact, this morning so all in all, it’s a success.

But what kills me, I’m massive. Like, I’m talking, I can’t see my toes, don’t bother asking when the last time I shaved my legs were (hello, there are arteries down there, I don’t want to die, smooth legs or not). Yet he seems to point out the obvious when it comes to doing things. The other night he was in the bathroom was in the other room and I asked him to turn the fan on. He comes into the bedroom and looks at me, point blank and says “why can’t you do it?” Umm, jackhole, it took me 30 mins to hoist myself into bed, the bed YOU refuse to lower. “Pretty please with sugar on top?”

He did it because he wanted to live to meet his daughter.

He won’t, however, look for the hairy, scary spider that is residing in my SUV that made me almost hit a shopping cart at Target the other day. He’s convinced that it won’t bite me, kill me, and then eat me.

Apparently he doesn’t know “women and children go first”. Ass.

34 Weeks — I know, my work shirts are getting way too short

35 Weeks

36 Weeks

Yea. I told you, I’m not terribly good at keeping up with this. I’m trying though, honest!

So where do I begin?

Oh yea, 15 Aug was our follow up fetal echo for the little miss. SOMEONE *ahem this child* didn’t want to cooperate. Commence shaking. Oh and I’m pretty sure the tech think E and I need to not have children together. Or at the very least, find a suitable therapist that can tolerate us both. I guess it could have been the comment about “wait until we get home” and the way he put his hand up at me. Or the comment about “when you find the daddy, let me know.” Either way, we assured her that no, we do not beat one another. Yes, E IS the father (and he knows). Yes, we were meant to be married.

16 Aug was my next appt with the docs and all is well in the world! She said “ok, it could be any time now”.

Well shit.

That wasn’t what I was hoping to hear.  I was hoping to hear “oh, you have time left so go ahead and relax and take your time”. Instead, what I heard was “Commence freaking out because you’re screwed”

Great.

Now I’m just in a “hurry up and wait” pattern. Waiting for the minute that I think I might have peed myself, only to discover “hey look, there’s a little arm coming out”. Wait no, The Sibling said that can’t happen.

We’ll see.

But I can’t even blame her.

Yesterday and Sunday were quite scary for both E and I. Sunday morning I started throwing up. Not like “morning sickness” hurling. Like laying-on-the-floor-writhing-in-pain-crying-and-crawling-hurling.

Except I don’t cry when I throw up. I’ve mastered the art of getting in and getting out without waking anyone up.

Thank you 24 yrs of migraines.

But I digress.

So yea, I was throwing up and not just once. I’m talking at least 7 times. I finally napped a little and choked down some more food but sadly, that made a second appearance.

Monday, I woke up and still felt like utter hell but I got dressed and went into work, only to be told “call the doc”. I discussed it with E and he sided with the 6 men that I work with agreed and said “let’s go” so I called the doc and they said “come on in”

5 hours in Labor and Delivery and I was labeled a Medical Mystery. No signs of significant dehydration, no blood, cramping, comtractions, nothing.

In fact, there was nothing AT ALL wrong with Le Bebe. She was happily kicking the monitor and making the monitors fall off my stomach. She had the nurses cracking up (and slightly irked that they had to keep readjusting the monitors LMAO)

But alas, we were released and told to go home, stay out of the heat, and attempt to keep her in the oven for at least another 2 weeks (YIKES!)

We’ll see if she listens…

30 Weeks

31 Weeks

I try not to complain about being pregnant and all things associated with being pregnant. I feel blessed every day, to wake up and still be pregnant. I’m ok with going to the doctor’s 5 times a month if it means I get to hear her heartbeat and know that things are going ok.